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[Hake.]

Citygroup HQ

Terminal 3

Dublin Airport

11 April 1997

 

We at Thuirling group would like to release a Public Service announcement:

 

Thuirling is pronounced 'hurling'. It is the word in the Irish language for 'to land'.

 

In other news, CEO Hake O' Ekah has announced that Thuirling will not be taking on many more destinations until further notice. This is because of a lack of gates at major airports. Although Hake denies growth has been 'stunted', he will continue to actively fight off competitors. Hake was asked about why Thuirling's 10 weekly flights between Dublin and Los Angeles were reduced to daily flights. "The answer is simple." he said. " Have you tried charging €355 on a 9 hour flight? It costs us €65 alone per passenger on In Flight Services alone. That doesn't include food and other charges." Also, until further notice, Gaelic won't be leasing more gates either. City Group issued a statement saying: "We are not in a position to expand on our operations to major airports until at least 2000. Our 25 minute check in at regional airports will remain and our great prices will stay." it read.